However, after he "ssshhhhh'd" me for singing to the radio, insinuated my home town was a Mecca for white trash, and then brought me back to his place for a review of his porno collection (which he'd "conveniently" left out), I'd had about enough. So after patiently waiting in this douchebag's living room for him to shower and change for two hours, I got a anxious. So I wandered down the hall figuring he MUST be almost ready. That's when I saw this guy, door wide open, butt-ass naked, and well how do I say it... Trimming the verge?
Needless to say I was mortified, and quietly backed down the hall. I then curled into the fetal position and went to my happy place, wondering if there was a way to surgically remove memories.
Much to my surprise, there is actually a name for this - "Manscaping". And evidently it is a little known part male hygiene rituals around the globe. I can't believe this is the first I'm hearing about this! Am I the only chick not in the know?I mean it's a well known fact that us ladies are known, even expected to keep our business in order, but I never guessed this was a priority for members of the opposite sex.
According to my source however (who will not be named, as I fear for his safety), ther is another, darker motive behind this ritual. It's like this ladies - your prize roses look a lot bigger when you keep the grass cut.
We are being duped! That's right, that well hung hottie you're so proud of is nothing but smoke and mirrors (and hair clippers). Ah, hell. Maybe I should give them credit for taking an interest in enhancing their assets. Lord knows women shell out billions every year to do just the same thing. But at least were out in the open about it... Who knew?
At least now I know the truth - 8 in inches my ass...
No comments:
Post a Comment